You spin me right round(about), baby

As far back as 1607 Jamestown, most people on this continent have viewed Europe as the standard for civility, fashion and overall societal evolution. And I get that. I mean, even I shudder to think about watching all those reality singing/dancing contest shows if all the hosts sounded like they were from Des Moines.

But we Americans have also shown ourselves to be a headstrong bunch. And I can't think of a better place to draw a distinction from the Old World than in the proliferation of the transportation phenomena known as roundabouts.

To be clear, I am completely on board with the concept of roundabouts. They should allow for freer flow of traffic at intersections, assuming everyone knows how to navigate them. But as any South Bend driver can tell you, very few people have the slightest clue what to do when they approach these things. For most, it's the driving equivalent of solving a Rubik's Cube. 

The largest number of offenders simply have no idea what a "Yield" sign means. They'll come to a complete stop with a complete look of befuddlement on their face, as if the whole thing is some sort of Candid Camera gag. It's like they can't come to grips with the fact that their turn doesn't really need to be preceded with a stop. Somehow, these people feel a stop is their rite of passage to change directions.

But even if the car in front of you does make it into the actual roundabout, that's no guarantee you're out of the woods, I've found. Far too many times I've encountered the beleaguered soul who has stopped - STOPPED - in the middle of the roundabout because they figured the car waiting at the yield sign had been there long enough, and it was time to let them in.

Others simply give up trying to figure it out. Without exaggeration, yesterday I saw a USPS driver doing little more than taking laps in a roundabout. By the time I cleared the intersection, they were on the home stretch of lap three. Folks, if government employees don't know what to do with these things, what chance do the rest of us have?

With the anarchy that exists there, you have to wonder if roundabouts cause more accidents. Oh wait. You don't have to wonder anymore.

City planners, I implore you. This isn't 1607, and today we're dependent on Europe for little more than someone to bail out every so often.  As tempting as it may be to draw up plans for a beautiful new roundabout to alleviate traffic congestion, please remember your constituency, and let's keep the right angles intact.

You feel me?

AF